If you give a toddler a nap…

If you give a toddler a nap, she insist that she wants to sleep on mommy and daddy’s bed. If you take her to mommy and daddy’s bed, she will close her eyes and pretend to sleep so you will leave the room. If you leave the room, she will get bored and start to roll around getting all tangled in the blankets. If she gets under all the blankets, she will pretend it is a fort and need some snacks. If she feels hungry, she will notice the Jolly Ranchers left by your midnight snacking husband by the bed and start to roll one around in her mouth, getting all your sheets all sticky. If she gets the bed sticky, she will try and lick off the sticky and get a very dry mouth. If she gets a dry mouth, she will go over to the dresser and get off the water bottle that you left there for your morning drink and drink all the water while looking at herself in the mirror. If she looks in the mirror, she will notice how much she doesn’t look like a zebra and take the Sharpy from the dresser top and start to draw on her arms and legs and face and tummy to make herself look like a zebra. If she makes herself look like a zebra, she will notice she doesn’t blend in with her surroundings and start to draw on the door, the dresser and the bed to make it look more like the Sahara dessert. If she draws on the door, mommy will hear a little noise and come to check on her angel and have a little freak out. If mommy has a little freak out, she will put the toddler in the bathtub to be away from mommy while she cleans up the mess as much as possible. If the toddler goes to the bathtub, the warm water will make her feel sleepy and mommy will come back and tell that toddler that it’s time for a nap…

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